For the Love of Textiles

It seems that at this phase in my life things have changed. Things I loved to do before Bram passed away suddenly don't work anymore for me.. Not much enjoyment in cooking anymore.... And... I used to knit for years everyday, but I haven't knit now seriously for months. Guess it is because of the importancy knitting had in that difficult period we both had. Knitting always brought me into a relaxing mood. Sitting and knitting  next to him while he watched tv. Knitting is connected to him in a way, and that is why it is so difficult to start again...might not make sense to you, but it does to me. I have to block a finished scarf.. And finish off an Icelandic cardi for myself.. Just a buttonband and ordering buttons....not that much work.. Than there is a simple Ishbel on the needles..waiting to be picked up.. Really should work on all of them.... And, I bought some Beautiful Shilasdair yarn while on the Isle of Skye, for an upcoming Winter sw...

Some days are difficult...some days go a little better... I sometimes feel we are living in an inbetween period in our life. Difficult sometimes to deal with, but there is also awareness of how special life is. Often memories turn up... Today while I took Bram in his wheelchair to the market I suddenly saw us -29 years ago- walking there. Buying vegetables and flowers on a Saturday in spring. Everything taken home in a natural canvas bag from Marimekko. A warm day it was, and we both felt good together. He must have looked like this picture. I always feel good with him..very good, even now when he is ill and I push the wheelchair. We both cross borders to make the most of it. But he is tired, his eyesight get's worse and walking is very difficult. Every day he has to pick himself up to start the day. I admire him for that, but I also understand it when he says that life is getting hard for him, and that he doesn't like to live in this way... From the beginning I ...